It’s just like being held hostage

I’m well aware these open mic sessions can drag on, as with a holiday party where you don’t know anyone and you spend the last hour plotting how to sneak out the front door like a burglar.

In fact, I recall one particular evening at the DFW Songwriters Open Mic when, about three hours into a two-hour event, a large fellow in a hoodie stepped up to the microphone, said, “My name is Lamar and this first song is called I Miss You,” and for the next 30 minutes entertained us a capella with a quavering falsetto that never quite found a melody.

I felt like a hostage. Continue reading

Posted in: Gigs at 5:04 pm Wed, Jan 6, 2010.

Bizarro Phil drops acid, sees Jesus

While the rest of the country collapsed into a financial puddle during 2009, Big Phil’s Love Parade host Big Phil enjoyed a fine annual return.

He cranked out his raw, politics-and-porn Sunday night podcast on a consistent basis, held on to his thankless white-collar job, banned soy from his diet and trimmed down, dyed his bald head orange, and survived a spectacular Oklahoma City Christmas Eve blizzard.

Predictably, Big Phil’s alter ego followed an alternate track. In his first annual greeting to listeners, Bizarro Phil revealed that he partied in 2010 by “having sex without protection” with his “kinky girlfriend.” Further, he announced, “I will drop acid. I am smoking a bong, smoking pot.”

Finally, a clearly addled Bizarro Phil said (coining a phrase), “I am trying to put a show snovel of blow in my nose.”

And then he saw Jesus. Continue reading

Posted in: Podcast Roundup at 1:49 am Wed, Jan 6, 2010.